Over Spending & Impulse Buying: 8 Reasons Why You’re Not To Blame

I was returning from work Friday evening (I take the bus), when I overheard a conversation between two women (possibly co-workers heading home).
One woman complimented the other on the blouse she was wearing. She smiled and responded, “Glad you liked it. You know, I had to hide this from my husband. He would throw a fit if he knew how much I paid for this!”

I am sure you can also relate to similar situations. Think back to the last time you spent money. Perhaps it was yesterday or even a few hours ago. Perhaps you can’t remember the last thing that you bought!
Ask yourself the reason for making that spending decision. Did you buy something necessary such as groceries or medication? Was the item something you needed or just wanted at that moment? Did you worry about having enough money to pay for the item? Did the purchase cost more than you thought it should or did you even worry about the price? Did spending the money make you feel guilty or did it give you pleasure?

At one point or another we all come across moments where we can’t resist the urge to buy something. I usually get the “reality” check when I receive my credit card bill! While we sometimes get criticized for over spending and impulse buying, I don’t think that it’s ENTIRELY our fault! Society, strategic product decisions, advertising and marketing make certain items so…. appealing!

1. “Touch me, use me, take me home!”
This is especially true for electronic items. Have you noticed how companies unveil their latest gadgets? Ideally, they want you to pick it up, touch it, or interact in a multisensory way. They want you to “come and experience” it(for free!). Naturally, you want to. After all, there is so much hype around the product, and you want to “try it yourself”.

When you get a taste of the experience, you instantly get emotionally attached to it. Before you know it, you are thinking of ways to ”squeeze” some money to buy this “marvelous” product!

2. “Use this coupon to get a 10% discount” I often feel like I am loosing “free” money if I don’t use the coupon.
Coupons can compel you to buy items that you don’t really need. Often, it is likely that you wouldn’t have bought the item, had you not seen the coupon. Saving $2.00 off a $20 item is good, but not spending the $20 in the first place is much better. Don’t you think?

3. Temptation near the checkout counter
Once you purchase the items you need, you have to wait a few minutes until it’s your turn to pay the bill. Irresistible DVDs, alluring magazines, along with overpriced beverages and candy…. Retailers make good use of this situation, by placing these near the counter!

4. "Oh my gosh! That's so cool. I've gotta get one."
Shops have a funny way of ”romancing the consumer”! Whether it’s just wandering into a store or standing before a display window, you get sucked in.

5. “Buy 2 and get one free” Arh! The word “free”! You feel compelled to buy it, just because you get one item free. Have you noticed that most of these item prices end with .99($5.99, $14.99)? This make it a little more difficult in calculating the “saving”. I am yet to see a person computing the mathematics! As a result, “buy two get one free” might actually lead to saving a few cents.
Another factor to keep in mind is the expiry date. Sometimes, they package things you need, but these items are about to expire. So having 3 of the same item wouldn’t do you any good.

6. “I buy things thinking they’ll cheer me up, give me something to do.”
Recently one of my friend’s broke up with her boyfriend and to get through the ordeal she started spending time at the mall. If she saw something that made her feel good, she would simply buy it without thinking much.
Shops go to extra lengths to ensure that shopping is an enjoyable event for the customer. There are times when I went shopping and felt like I did something good, fun, and beneficial!

7. “30% Off on when you purchase above ...!"
When you see a “super deal” like this, you feel like a winner. These deals make you believe that you WILL save money. However, this offer requires you to spend a certain amount, in order to get the percentage off. This is a great bargain if you have items that you actually NEED to buy, but often you end up buying frivolous items just to take advantage of deal.

8. “Call and order right now and receive this added bonus of..” Our desire to spend start with the hundreds of advertising messages we're bombarded with each day from multiple media, from television and radio to billboards and email pop-ups.
Advertising agencies carefully select models, images, settings, scenes, and story lines to evoke an image, a feeling, and a fantasy of how one's life would be transformed through owning a product. How many times have you fallen a prey to these advertisements?

Have you caught yourself falling trap to any of these situations?

Reference:

• Why We Buy: The Science Of Shopping
• Why People Buy Things They Don't Need: Understanding and Predicting Consumer Behavior

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Scientology Today: International Youth Summit Demands Governments Restore Fundamental Human Rights

Scientology Today: International Youth Summit Demands Governments Restore Fundamental Human Rights

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Sleep Deprived ? 7 Ways To Revive Your Tired Body And Stay Energized After A Sleep Deprived Night

While it is recommended that you sleep for 6-8 daily, there are some nights where sleep becomes a luxury. Whether it’s a 20 hour work day, caring for a sick child, cramming for an exam, a late night party or the sheer though of getting married the following day(!!), [add your list here] can leave you weary eyed and lethargic the following day.
Staying energized and getting through the following day might sound like a daunting task, but it is possible. Here are 7 ways to help you do just that.

1. Exercise. I can hear you morn. This is probably the last thing you want to do when you haven’t had sleep. No, I am not talking about a high intensity workout. A 10-15 minutes exercise session can give you an energy boost. If you are too tired for even that, try stretching. A few simple arm and leg stretches will wake up your cells and give you an instant burst of alert.

2. Take a cold/cool shower.Ok, now I know you really want to strangle me! I know this sounds silly, but it works! It has a motivating effect and will definitely “wake up” the brain!

3. Don’t skip breakfast.When we are pressed for time in the morning, one thing we tend to compromise on is our breakfast. Skipping breakfast on top of a sleepless night, is definitely not way to revive a tired body.
Metabolism researcher Dr.William Evans, recommends whole grains like brown rice and whole-wheat bread. Apparently, fiber provides a long-lasting source of energy for your brain and muscles.
You should try having a glass of juice as well. Whether it’s orange juice, apple juice or grape juice they contain healthy amounts of sugars, nutrients, and vitamins that will lace your brain cells with energy.

4. Listen to some upbeat songs. There are some songs that have the ability to get your toes tapping irrespective of how sleepy you are. Stock up your ipod or media player with a few of these songs. They come in handy, when a cold shower is not an option!

5. Get some fresh air. If the weather is accommodating, step outside. Fresh air has a very soothing and revitalizing effect. The change of scenery will also be refreshing, even if it is for a short period.

6. Have a good laugh! If you are not surround by a jovial character, there’s always YouTube! I read somewhere that laughing revs up the respiratory system and oxygenates the body.

7. Choose a scent. I don’t know about you but I feel revived when I put on some perfume. You can also try scented candles or even sniff a lemon, orange etc.


How do you keep yourself vitalized, after a sleep deprived night?

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Book Review:Who’s Pulling Your Strings? (How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation ...)

Being manipulated is a highly stressful experience. It is unpleasant, demeaning, and disturbing. How does one become a victim of manipulation? Why, when and by whom? What can be done to stop it? Who's Pulling Your Strings?: How to Break the Cycle of Manipulation and Regain Control of Your Life by Dr. Harriet Braiker users her 25-plus years experience in practicing clinical psychology, to answer these questions.

My Favorite Excerpt
Have you ever felt as though someone is pulling your strings—making you do things you would rather not or stopping you from doing things you would prefer to continue? Have you tried to untangle the strings only to find that you become more entrapped with each futile struggle?

You are not likely to change a manipulator by pointing out that his/her tactics are unfair or that you feel unhappy with the way the relationship is going. To put it bluntly, manipulators
do not care about your feelings. They are out to serve one purpose: to advance their own interests and goals, frequently at your expense.

Who’s Pulling Your Strings? Let’s Find Out!

Chapter 1: An Overview of Manipulation The book starts off by distinguishing between Manipulation and Influence. It highlights that manipulation reinforces dependency, helplessness, and victimization.

Chapter 2: Manipulation in Five Acts Describes five stories that are representative of the coercive control and helplessness that manipulation creates. The stories given were very practical and “real life”. It made me wonder about how I would handle such dilemmas.

Chapter 3: Are You Vulnerable to Manipulation? Dr. Harriet points out that everybody is vulnerable to manipulation and that some people are more vulnerable than others.
This chapter also provides a quiz to asses our own vulnerability to manipulation.

Chapter 4: Your Buttons Are Showing (I couldn’t help but smile at the chapter title) Examines the personality traits and tendencies that make you a mark for manipulators. It will make you aware of the “buttons” of vulnerability that you unwittingly expose to other people.

Chapter 5: Manipulators’ Motives I have often wondered, “what makes manipulators do what they do?” I got my answers here. Apparently there are two categories of manipulators: those who are aware and conscious of their manipulative motives and those who remain largely unconscious or unaware of the manipulative methods they employ in their relationships with others.

Chapter 6: Who Are the Manipulators in Your Life? Helps you to achieve greater understanding about the relationships in which you are involved. In particular, about the dynamics of power and control that characterizes those relationships.
Learning to recognize the personality traits of people who are likely to use manipulation as a customary practice, is a good way to arm yourself with an early warning system.

Chapter 7: How Manipulation Works States that manipulation, is much like a magic trick. Initial when I read that sentence my mind yelled, “What….”. The next paragraph explained that if you take the time to learn how manipulation works, it is less likely that you will be caught off guard when confronted with it because you will know what to look for. True enough, the mystery will be gone.

Chapter 8: What Are Your Hooks? Describes some hard truths that we know is true but find it hard to adhere to. “The areas where you feel most in need of gains and/or most fearful or concerned about losses are actually the hooks by which you are most likely to be reeled into a manipulative relationship” says it all doesn’t it?

Chapter 9: The Mechanics of Manipulation Talks of the five basic ways that manipulators control their victims. By being aware of these methods, you can make yourself a hardened target for manipulators.

Chapter 10: Are You in a Manipulative Relationship? Provides a quiz that will help reveal whether you are participating in a manipulative relationship.

Chapter 11: The Impact of Manipulation Highlights that manipulation is harmful to your emotional health because it creates and perpetuates your feelings and self-perception as a victim. The more victimized you feel, the less capable you will feel to free yourself from the toxic pattern.

Chapter 12: Resistance Tactics This is probably the core chapter of the book. It describes 7 key steps to resist manipulation. Basically, these are things that you can do instead of meekly giving in and reinforcing the toxic pattern of manipulation.

Chapter 13: How to Make Yourself a Hardened Target Makes an attempt to replace your flawed thinking with healthier, self-protective ideas, which will deter instead of attract manipulators.

Chapter 14: Final Curtain on Manipulation in Five Acts Revisits the stories in chapter 2, and analyzes them by using the resistance tactics. Dr. Harriet ends the book by saying,
If we succeed together, you will have a great answer the next time someone asks you, “Who’s pulling your strings?” You can look them dead in the eye and say, “Nobody but me.”

What This Book Is Not

It is not intended to apply to relationships in which physical violence—or the threat of physical violence—is used as a means of control.
Neither is this book intended for people being manipulated by someone who abuses alcohol and/or drugs.

Overall: Is Who's Pulling Your Strings? Worth Reading?

I have yet to meet anyone who has not been manipulated by someone at some point in his or her life. Sometimes, we are aware that we are being manipulated. Other times, we are blinded by emotion don’t realize that we are being victimized.

So whether you believe you are a victim or not, Who's Pulling Your Strings? will help you strengthen those areas of your personality that set you up as a soft target or a “mark” for manipulation and teach you the necessary resistance tactics to help you break free of manipulation.

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Human Rights - ECO

Singer reaches out to Lynn students

Daily Item, The (Lynn, MA)
Author: ROBIN KAMINSKI; THE DAILY ITEM

Singer/songwriter Kelly Riley wants to extend her musical talents to kids in Lynn who are eager to learn how to make music. Having recently received an alumni grant from Berklee College of Music in Boston for $5,000, Riley, a Lynn resident, is ready to teach a handful of kids how to hone their own musical abilities. However, due to the limited funds, Riley said she is going to select the dozen or so kids by holding an essay contest. "I thought it would be a good idea to have a contest for kids to understand a little more about the Declaration of Human Rights because it has everything to do with music, creativity and the freedom of expression," she said. "Just a little paragraph or two about why they think it's important."

Riley said she got the idea for the essay topic from a volunteer gig a few years back, called Youths For Human Rights International in Boston. The group is an independent non-profit corporation that aims to educate young people on their human rights.

"The more kids understand their human rights, the more they will understand people," she said. "I also plan to give each of the kids a booklet on all of the 30 human rights, a recorder, and voice once a week for eight weeks for school-aged kids who are seven to 17 years old. "I'm also looking for donations of small electric key boards and guitars," she said. "For those kids that can't get instruments, I'll give them voice lessons instead."

As a child, Riley said she picked up her older brother's guitar and quickly learned how to play the instrument, and is excited to help other children realize their own talents.
"The alumni grant is all about setting examples and doing good things," she said. "I thought it would be a good idea to teach a few underprivileged kids in the city."

Copyright, 2008, The Daily Item, All Rights Reserved.

Inspirational Quotes To Get You Through The Toughest Of Days

In life, all of us experience passing moments of frustration, disappointment, and pain; there are times when things seems hopeless and pointless. No matter how hard we try to remain positive about certain situations, it can be a little depressing.

At times, we may not have our loved ones around us to comfort us or give us the self assurance we need. Or we may not want to “talk” about it.
Going beyond a bucket of chocolate ice cream or a thanksgiving flower, inspirational quotes can be great asset when you feel this way. I have tried this myself and found it to be very effective. It is amazing how some quotes can help uplift even the most negative situation.

There a few quotes I remember and recall on a daily basis. These quotes help me stay calm and collected (sane!!), amidst times of chaos.

1. When people pounce on your self-confidence

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Oh, there are some people who really suck self-confidence right out of me! There have been many occasions where I had to repeat this quote to myself.
Even though someone's words may be ugly (and even intentionally hurtful), no one can make you feel bad about yourself - UNLESS there is some part of you than agrees with what they're saying.
When we get caught up in emotion, all rationality is taken away. Remembering this quote is a good nudge to let you know that irrespective of what anyone says to you, if you know better, then there's no reason to take it to heart.

2. When you can’t take it any longer (& want to quit!)

"What does not kill me makes me stronger."~JohannWolfgang von Goethe

It’s no coincidence that I grit my teeth every time I say this to myself! It reminds me that whatever I am going through is just temporary; the “situation” I am in now will make me stronger to deal with other things life may throw at me.

3. When you are at cross roads trying to decide

"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing that you will make one."~Ellen Hubbard

When I have a make a major decision, I generally look for a “guarantee card”. I know... life doesn’t work that way! Even though it’s something I am trying to shake off, there are moments where “the fear of making a mistake” is powerful enough to keep me immobilized.
That’s when I remember Ellen Hubbard wise words. The fear of making mistakes can prevent us from trying anything new or moving out of our comfort zone. This is such a waste of our skills and robs us from truly enjoying life.

Do you have a set of inspirational quotes that you keep in mind?

If not, compile a list of quotes for yourself. Try to recall the quotes when you are going through a rough patch.

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Hannibal & Aline - Use Your Own Hospitals in Libya, Next Time!

Hannibal & Aline Kadhafi - Use Your Own Hospitals in Libya, Next Time!

Servants Drop Charges Against Kadhafi Son - AFP - 2 September 2008

GENEVA (AFP) — Two servants who accused the son of Libyan leader Moamer Kadhafi of mistreating them in a Geneva hotel have dropped their legal complaints against him and his wife, their Swiss lawyer said Tuesday.

"In a free, considered and informed manner, my clients have decided to withdraw the legal complaint that they filed," said lawyer Francois Membrez.

Hannibal Kadhafi was arrested in July along with his wife Aline at a luxury hotel in the lakeside city after the servants -- a Moroccan and a Tunisian -- alleged they had been abused by the couple.

The Kadhafis denied the allegations and Libya demanded a Swiss apology.

In a statement, Geneva-based Membrez said the two servants, who no longer work for the couple, have been "properly compensated," although he gave no specific figures.

"They have been recognised as victims and their sufferings have been taken into account," the lawayer added.

"They have also received a temporary humanitarian residence permit in Switzerland."

The case angered Libya, which restricted air links, stopped issuing visas to Swiss nationals, shut the Tripoli offices of two major Swiss companies and detained two Swiss nationals -- who were subsequently released.

Membrez last month accused Libya of holding the brother and mother of the Moroccan servant "hostage" over the affair.

The mother has since been released, but on Tuesday, Membrez said there was still no news of the brother, adding that he would take the case to the UN High Commissioner for Human Rights in Geneva.

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Sources of Information

Servants drop charges against Kadhafi son - AFP - 2 September 2008

Gaddafi abuse complaints withdrawn - swissinfo.ch - 2 September 2008

List of Hospitals in Libya For Hannibal Gaddafi

* * * * *

This case may have fallen through the cracks however there will be other cases including ones where Outsiders (not the victims) will enforce the law instead, on the abusers.

Pakistan - Jafferabad - Baba Kot - This is Not Cricket!

Pakistan - Jafferabad District - Baba Kot - This is Not Cricket!

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Five Women (with Brains and obvious Intelligence), wanted to pick their OWN husbands

- Buried Alive in Mass Honour Killing

Five women have been buried alive by their tribe in a mass honour killing, prompted by their wish to choose their own husbands. The victims, who included three teenagers, were abducted at gunpoint, beaten and shot before being thrown into a ditch. They were still breathing as their bodies were covered with rocks and mud, according to media reports and human rights activists.

The incident occurred in Baba Kot, a remote village in Jafferabad district, after the women decided to defy tribal elders and arrange marriages in a civil court, according to the Asian Human Rights Commission.

They were said to have been abducted at gunpoint by six men, forced into a vehicle and taken to a remote field, where they were beaten, shot and then buried alive, it said, accusing local authorities of trying to hush up the killings.

* * * * *

OLYMPIC GAMES

What does a country's global achievements say about their level of education, ingenuity, values system and their contribution to the advancement of human civilization?

Pakistan (PAK)

Silver - National team - 1956 Melbourne - Field hockey - Men's competition
Gold - National team - 1960 Rome - Field hockey - Men's competition
Bronze - Mohammad Bashir - 1960 Rome - Wrestling - Men's freestyle welterweight
Silver - National team - 1964 Tokyo - Field hockey - Men's competition
Gold - National team - 1968 Mexico - Field hockey - Men's competition
Silver - National team - 1972 Munich - Field hockey - Men's competition
Bronze - National team - 1976 Montreal - Field hockey - Men's competition
Gold - National team - 1984 Los Angeles - Field hockey - Men's competition
Bronze - Syed Hussain Shah - 1988 Seoul - Boxing - Men's middleweight
Bronze - National team - 1992 Barcelona - Field hockey - Men's competition

Pakistan has not won any medals since 1994.

* * * * *

A Pakistani lawmaker provoked outrage by defending the men from the Baluch tribe who had carried out the killings. Israr Ullah Zehri told stunned members of Pakistan's parliament: 'These are centuries-old traditions and I will continue to defend them,' 'Only those who indulge in immoral acts should be afraid.' He claimed the tribal traditions helped stop obscenity - and then asked fellow lawmakers not to make a big fuss about it.

Many stood up in protest, saying the executions were 'barbaric' and demanding more discussion. But a handful said it was an internal matter of the deeply conservative province of Baluchistan.

'I was shocked,' said lawmaker Nilofar Bakhtiar, who pushed for legislation calling for perpetrators of so-called honour killings to be punished when she served as minister of women's affairs under the last government. 'I feel that we've gone back to the starting point again,' she said. 'It's really sad for me.' The incident apparently occurred about a month ago.

Accounts about the killings have varied, largely because police in the tribal region have been uncooperative.

The Asian Human Rights Commission, however, said the two older women may have been related to some of the teenage girls and were apparently murdered because they were sympathetic to their wishes. There have been claims one of the perpetrators was related to a top provincial official.

* * *

The word tradition comes from the Latin word traditio which means "to hand down" or "to hand over." It is used in a number of ways in the English language: Beliefs or customs taught by one generation and transferred to the next, often orally. It can refer to maintaining an established status quo in the favour of some of the participants. The word Tradition is sometimes incorrectly used, in situations driven by Self Interest and Profit.

* * * * *

Famous Male Pakistanis (Females are Absent From Defining Pakistan's National Identity)

The poet and philosopher of a revitalized Islam, Mohammad Iqbal (1873–1938), who wrote in Urdu, Farsi, and English, first called for the establishment of a Muslim state on the subcontinent in a statement made in 1930.

Mohammad Ali Jinnah (1876–1948), the Quaid-e-Azam, or "Great Leader," rallied the Muslims to this cause and became the first governor-general of the Commonwealth of Pakistan.

The Pakistani-born scientist Abdus Salam (1926–96) shared the 1979 Nobel Prize for Physics for his work in electromagnetism and the interaction of elementary particles.

In literature, the paramount position is still held by the great Urdu writers who lived before the establishment of Pakistan. Ghalib (1796–1869) and Iqbal are recognized as the two greatest Urdu poets.

Foremost among Pakistan's artists is Abdur Rahman Chughtai (1899–1975).

World-class cricket players such as Fazal Mahmood, Hanif Mohammad, Sarfaraz Nawaz, Mushtaq Mohammad, Imran Khan, Javed Miandad, Abdul Qadir, Wasim Akram, Inzamam-ul-Haq, Saeed Anwar, Waqar Younis, Mohammad Yousuf and Shoaib Akhtar. Ismail Gulgee - Famous Painter

* * * * *

Sources of Information

Pakistan investigates 'honor killings' of 5 women - (Associated Press)

Five women who wanted to pick their own husbands buried alive in mass honour killing (Daily Mail - Great Britain)

Shot, then buried alive in honour killings (The Sydney Morning Herald - Australia)

Humor Edition: What Dr.Phil, Britney Spears, Einstein (& Others) Had To Say To…

In one my previous posts, I provided several ideas on how we can escape our daily monotonous routine. I thought I will take my own advice and apply it to this blog. So this is my attempt to take a break from the monotonous Enhance Life routine. Hope you enjoy the answers to this very old joke!


Captain Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Dr.Phil: Well, we must first answer the question: how did the chicken feel about that?

Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken is a matter of relativity.

Britney Spears: Because it was not an egg, not yet a chicken.

Sigmund Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed theroad reveals underlying insecurities that stem from your early relationships with your parents.

Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason.

Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

Grandpa: In my day, we didn’t ask anyone why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody just told us the chicken crossed the road and that was good enough for us.

OK. Now it’s your turn. Where does your creativity lead you? Anyone you’d like to add? Leave a comment and we can all have a hearty laugh. (Once in a way we all need to take a break from personal development and smile!)

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